Friday, May 14, 2010

What are your Marriage Habits?

I heard from one of the afternoon TV show that 'marriage is a very complicated business'. Two people live together with different personality, different life experience and different expectations.

While growing up I always encounter this quotation "love is patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never selfish or rude. Love does not demand its own way. It does not hold grudges and hardly even notices when others do it wrong".

I got a friend who's also married and I ask him about his marriage. He said that from the start they set house rules and put it in writing and even framed it. Funny right, but it worked for them. Whenever one of them violates they go back to it and talk.

While reading online I got this page 'Seven Habits of Successful Couples'. I really really liked it.
-Give each other pleasure do not cause pain
-Create love and friendship rituals
-Create a safe space for open and honest sharing
-Work together to resolve conflict and crisis
-Turn toward each other, rather than away
-Schedule time for love
-Create meaning in your relationship

Writing down and exchanging each others expectations is really effective. You don't have to guess anymore. Constant communication is important, let's try to know our spouse deeper,know his/her thoughts, feelings, desires, and dreams.Share it with each other and dream together. By these, you two create and share the meaning of life together.

I am not a perfect wife, this 'Seven Habits of Successful Couples' I will give it a try.